Small Group Wedding?

Note: Our wedding did not end up having small groups. Sorry! However, Calvin Dame's homily on what a true UU wedding is was loved by all.

This Saturday I am getting married to a fellow lifelong Unitarian Universalist and religious professional. She is the minister of our Newport, RI congregation and I am a freelance church consultant. I mention this first because I will be away from the computer for a week. Secondly, because it is going to be a huge Big Fat UU Wedding with people from the four congregations we are connected to attending. Obviously not all the members of four churches, but enough to make a very large and exciting UU celebration.

When Calvin Dame agreed to officiate he said, somewhat jokingly, that he'd do it as long as he got to break everyone up in to small groups. I would love to see Calvin break up 350 people into small groups during our wedding! Okay, maybe during the reception to follow. Either way it would add something for sure. Chaos? Maybe. But certainly a touch of intimacy that a large wedding can easily lack.

Though we are not having small groups at the wedding, I would like to make a plug for small group ministry and weddings. As I have been planning on moving for some time, when my small group grew and divided, we decided it would be a good time for me to step down as facilitator and have the two facilitators I was mentoring take over the new groups. We also decided it would be easier for them to find their own unique style of facilitating without me in one of the groups. The result? After the new year I left my group and facilitating at my congregation. At present I am serving on their steering committee and am looking forward to a new group soon, in Newport.

This week I wish I had a small group ministry session scheduled. Yes, I have family and friends, but few things are like a great small group ministry! My suggestion - strongly encourage people to make time for their group before significant rites of passage.

As for me, I'm hoping Calvin wasn't joking! Maybe during his homily he will pause and make people talk in small groups on the meaning of love.